31st of July

It’s his birthday today. Yes, I am one pathetic lady and I don’t care about what other people will say because I’m sure that I’ve moved on. It has been 6 years, for Goya’s sake. I just looooove dwelling on the past. Yes, that is my excuse and it’s marked valid by the DTI.

So this day, 6 years ago, I surprised him with a simple breakfast. Two cups of instant noodles, a glass of milk (or juice), some packs of biscuits, and a little Hippo that he can cuddle when I’m not around.

I know for sure that he was happy to see me the moment he opened his eyes. But… that was also the day when everything was confirmed. All the suspicions, the lies, and the foolishness.

It marked the start of sleepless nights, heart-stopping nightmares, andΒ uncontrollable sobs and wails. I couldn’t forget the day, perhaps, I never will. It made me who I am now and I don’t know if that’s good or bad.

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I’m just not feeling well today.

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