I begin to settle in what Murakami calls a shadowy middle ground. I neither hide in the darkness nor run to the light. I form a bubble and isolate myself transforming everything else into a neutral still life.
Power has been out since 11:40 pm last night. It’s already twelve past seven in the evening and we’ve lost hope for the electricity to come back today. I’m on the verge of losing my cool because I need battery and an internet connection. But then, I think about my day and…
I ate three small packs of junk food after what seemed like ages. I saw a friend whom I haven’t seen for 10 months at the grocery store. I am a few chapters away from finishing a book I started reading this morning. See, I practically enjoyed my day hanging out with my nosy mother.
I used to enjoy blackouts when I was younger. My siblings and I would either stay in the terrace or join monobloc chairs together in the front lawn and curl up on it under a thin blanket. We would chatter about random nonsense stuff, sing along, and marvel at the stars while our helper fans us. When they got a little older, we started to play different card games – amo-amo, pares-pares, and 123 pass among others. Our favorites eventually became tong-its and Bullshit in the recent years.
Time Check: 7:47 pm
Tonight, however, I am glued on this cozy chair writing this down, straining my eyes because my only light source is a substandard candle. My mother and sister are cleaning up the kitchen as we just had our dinner. I’d probably get back to reading after this. Just so suddenly, I felt a pang realizing the absence of the other members of our family. My Papa isn’t here to start a serious conversation; my youngest sister isn’t here to frown, roll her eyes, pout her second-rate lips, and smirk. And we definitely miss my brother’s pranks in the dark.
Things are a lot different now. I remember I once wrote an article for my high school publication where I called brownouts as blessings in disguise. However of a hassle they were back then, they kind of forced us into these short, sweet, and unplanned bonding moments that turned out to be important memories.
I honestly can’t believe I’m not that pissed off although I’m currently on red tide. I guess I’m in the process of mastering the art of being patient and not being gutted over petty things. My day wasn’t entirely that bad, but I guess it could’ve been better with all of us together. We surely could’ve used great company especially in the dark.
Cue in Magkayakap sa Dilim.